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Public News Post #3353

Imaginary Contestation

Written by: Mortificare Ashel Savet, the Unholy Revenger
Date: Tuesday, April 27th, 2010
Addressed to: Magister Lord Ugralitan Iavas


I believe I've come up with some new ideas for your imaginary contestation platform that you might find worth believing in.

4. MANDATORY ILLITERACY

- Instead of public posts that embrace the concepts of formatting, legibility, and comprehensibility, all Kinsarmarians will instead be required to speak as though their words have been drawn at random from a hat. No more will the public have to wade through words longer than eight letters long or posts that actually have a point!

5. POWER TO THE PEOPLE, ALL OF THEM

- Even enemies of the city will be able to have a say in the democratic process! Simply send a letter to the Duke with your request to be involved and he will have to forward all referendums, polls, and elections to you for your input! (This idea was originally forwarded as the Ugralitan Bill, but our panel decided it needed a more catchy name.)

6. NEWSROOM VICTORIES

- Kinsarmar will never again have to lose a war! All Kinsarmarians will be banned from speaking the words 'surrender', 'treaty', or 'lose', and instead be required to posture (from behind grace) and make public posts (from behind grace) about how they won the war anyway (from behind grace)!

If you win with my ideas, I humbly request that you forward my name for Minister of Foreign Relations.

- Ephor Ashel Savet

Penned by my hand on the 23rd of Vita, in the year 607 AD.


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